Dear E. Jean: My boyfriend has a crush on Scarlett Johansson. Okay, I know everyone has a celebrity crush, but I don’t look anything like her. I’m a brunette, have a boyish figure, I’m kind of flat chested, actually. When we started dating, things were sparky, but after a year, he says he’s stressed out at work and doesn’t want to have sex. We used to have sex every day! Lately it’s once every two weeks. (I agree this is TMI, but it’s like he gets off and that’s that.) Is he suddenly not attracted to me anymore? Why are we fizzling out? Am I just not his type? —Scarlett Fever
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Miss Scarlett: Please. Of course he has a crush on Scarlett Johansson. If Scarlett Johansson and the U.S. Congress were trapped in a burning building, everybody would save Scarlett first. So ask yourself one question: WWSD? What Would Scarlett Do with a chap who refused to bang her?
Right. Your first reaction is the correct answer.
This letter is from the Ask E. Jean Archive, 1993-2017. Send questions to E. Jean at E.Jean@AskEJean.com.