Can I Ask Him Not to Have a Bachelor Party?

Dear E. Jean: Help! I don’t want my guy seeing, admiring, or being turned on by other naked women! Do I have to accept that my fiancé will attend a bachelor party?

E. Jean: Yes. Because if you tell him no, he’ll just lie and go anyway. But honestly, I’m sick of women feeling like they have to be okay with this seedy, stupid ritual so as not to appear controlling or uncool. I’d like us all to go totally gangsta, stand up, and shout at our chaps, “You’re not going to that damn bachelor party!”

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This letter is from the Ask E. Jean Archive, 1993-2017. Send questions to E. Jean at

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